A husband and wife were sitting at my bar this weekend when I overheard this conversation. I was drinking a water at the time and almost snorted it through my nose.
Wife: My god I’m full. I ate way too much.
Husband: Uh huh. Me too.
Wife: I hate when I do that, but the burger was soooo good.
Husband: Yep, that’ll do it.
Wife: That’s it, after this I’m going on a diet. I’m tired of this. Every time I look in the mirror, all I see is a fat, ugly old lady looking back at me.
Wife: Let me give you a lesson on etiquette, dear. As a husband and friend, this is precise moment that you pay me a compliment to make me feel better about myself.
Husband: Ok…you have outstanding eyesight.